Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
I am watching Grease 2 and properly learning how to apply a condom to a banana. This is a sign from God that this is the closest I will ever get to having the need for one.
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
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