i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
Randomize
