I hope mine doesn't look like that
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
Randomize
