Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
not only did i soak my thesis by spilling celebratory shots on it, but i also stained it with lipstick making it obvious i tried to drink the vodka off it......dgaf, worth it.
Just figured out I can wedge my iphone between my boobs so it stands up at a perfect handsfree reading angle. Clearly somebody up there wants me to smoke this bowl while I watch my bieber videos
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
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