I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
