we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
it's like heaven, but drunker
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
Randomize
