Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
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