Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
