Imagine two people making love on top of a unicorn . . . my life is the opposite of that.
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
apparently the secret to your success is patron
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
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