Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
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