i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
Randomize
