But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
Randomize
