Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
Randomize
