I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Randomize
