it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
Randomize
