Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
Sponge bath it is.
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
Over Bumbled last night. I think I set my dog up on a date Sunday afternoon. I have to drive him, meet the other dog’s dad and secretly drink a bottle of champagne from a “water bottle”. This is not what I expected 30 to be like.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Randomize
