Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
Randomize
