I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
Randomize