i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
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