her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
Randomize
