capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
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