I'm so tired of dating women who lie about their age. You show up feeling like you need to follow them around with a dust pan and a broom.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
Come share oat with me in your robe
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize
