I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
Randomize
