i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
Randomize
