just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
Don't stress. That was a joke. I'd trust my pets with no one else. Accidents happen. Sometimes things go smoothly when you help a neighbor out and sometimes you electrocute their fish. Life is funny that way.
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
Randomize
