my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
Randomize
