is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
Randomize
