Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
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