im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
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