they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
He's reached the drunk point where he's trying to convince the family to buy falcons as pets. Can't wait to see how my steak turns out
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
Randomize
