he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
i took a field sobriety test yesterday. a crowd gathered, watched me pass it and applauded. then the cops arrested me because i took a bow and fell over.
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
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