the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
Randomize
