I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
Randomize
