he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Randomize
