omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
Randomize