420 ftw
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
Randomize
