i already hear my dad disowning me
never play flip cup with pint glasses
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
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