What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
I'm at McDonalds and when I walked up to the register the guy said "I'm so sorry." Before I said a word. That's how bad my hangover is.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Randomize
