Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
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