Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
And then he peed in my hair
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