my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
I just blew my weed a kiss
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize
