Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
He tugged on my tampon string and said 'there's a snake in my boot'. Needless to say he called me Woody and quoted Toy Story the rest of the night.
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
Floor bacon is actually really good
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize
