does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
Def don't remember taking those pics I sent you...but it looks like I was in a car? Shit. Looks like my Uber passenger rating just went up exponentially.
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
Randomize
