Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
While I was dancing with him in my foil dress he said, "You're like a Chipotle burrito. Don't worry, that's the best complement you could get from me."
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
Randomize
