508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
I walked from the hotel to the club with a pint of tequila in my boot. Poured some in a homeless woman's mouth when she asked for change. I've hit rock bottom.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
I am never drinking with the goths again.
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