this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
Randomize
