after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
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