butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
I'm paying a homeless guy $20 to follow me around bars tonight with a boombox playing the theme to Rocky.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Randomize
