we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Randomize
