he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
Randomize
